Chrystal’s Chronicles Repost (6/10/13): I’m still clumsy. That’s all.
Any one who knows me knows I’m clumsy. I’m not even ashamed of it anymore. I just am… and that’s how God made me… and there’s nothing I can do about it.
No matter how hard I try at times, a drop or a spill or a fall is just inevitable. I’ve come to grips with the fact that I am who I am…
I’ve learned to slow down. There’s no point in careening into a free fall unnecessarily if all I had to do to avert disaster was to take it easy.
Every morning, I go and get my sweet baby Kanaan to spend a minute feeding and bonding with him in quiet before the rest of the world wakes up. I sneak into the boys room (they are roomates now), swiftly scoop up the baby before he can make a sound that will wake his older brother and then ever so carefully make my way down the stairs. There’s a reason why I CAREFULLY make my way down the stairs.
I’ve slipped and slid down the stairs before with a baby in my arms. Yup! You heard me right. I fell down the stairs with my oldest son when he was small. (This couldn’t have come as a surprise to you…I told you I was extremely clumsy).
Little Tre’ was fine cuz I guarded him with my life but my behind, back, and pride were extremely wounded!
You can only imagine how carefully I come down the stairs now when I have to carry BOTH of the boys down. Sometimes, Tre’ gets up when I enter the room to get Kanaan and I have to carry one son in each arm to get downstairs in the morning. I do it EVER SO SLOWLY. Why? Cuz I’m carrying precious cargo. (oh and b/c Tre’ WILL NOT be outdone just yet by his baby brother getting all Mommy’s arm love).
It has been unbelievably clear that the Lord has been saying the same thing to me….not about my clumsiness but about my LIFE. My family is precious cargo and I cannot possibly protect them and nourish them and care for them if I’m in danger of slipping up myself.
It’s my tendency to go “head-over-heels” deep into commitments that seemingly I just “have to do”. I am so readily “caught” in situations that take me beyond my acceptable speed of living life but I can’t afford to “slip up”(no pun on words intended :). So while I know that I’m a Type A, hyper-active, wanna get it all done, move at the speed of light, talk-to-God-on-the-go-kind-of-person, I realize that unless I want to risk a head on collision of sorts, I must slow down. If I take on more than what God designed for me to bear, I’m in trouble and so is my family.
You know when the Lord speaks to you and you hear His voice as you read His Word…..You hear his voice whisper and then you hear a couple of songs on the radio about what He just said to you and then the preacher later that weeks says the same thing !?!?
Well, the Lord has been telling me to slow it down through many channels, to be still and make time to hear his voice REGULARLY in a quiet place each day. For me that means getting up early and Lawd knows I go to bed too late to think about getting up early!
But something’s gotta give…..something’s GONNA give…
My husband and kids are too precious for me to let a simple bad habit of mine get in the way.