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Babies don’t keep.

When we have children, we are agreeing to devote the next 18 years of our lives to raising them. We teach them everything we can from learning how to walk, to learning how to manage finances. We pour into them all the knowledge and wisdom we have accumulated throughout our years in hopes that it will help them prepare to become life-giving functional adults. The truth is, our job as parents is to work ourselves out of a job as our children get older.  

And yet, no matter how hard we try, there are no guarantees. We can do everything right and still have children who make choices we disapprove of. God is the perfect parent. If he has adult wayward children, who are we to think we can parent better than God? What we can do is learn how to parent well and live with joy regardless of the paths our children decide to take.

In this episode of The Sister Circle Podcast, my guest is Mary Demuth. Mary is a writer, speaker, literary agent and lover of Jesus and her family. She has written several books and is known for being authentic and vulnerable when it comes to life’s challenges. In her latest book, Love, Pray, Listen: Parenting Your Wayward Adult Kids Mary shares how you can learn to be in healthy relationship with your adult children even if you disagree with their choices. 

Listen is as Mary and I discuss how to create long lasting friendships with your adult children regardless of their actions by:

  • Giving yourself permission to lament
  • Keeping the lines of communication open
  • Letting the joy of the Lord be your strength

If God was the perfect parent and he gave his children the gift to choose and the freedom not to choose him, we must recognize we cannot guarantee a certain outcome with our children. We have to give them the freedom to choose as well.

And that means accepting their choices. 

The world has sold us the lie that love equals applauding everything someone does. This is simply not true. It’s a fallacy that if you hold to your convictions you are not loving someone. You can choose not to applaud or accept everything as long as you always choose to love.

Highlights from Today’s Episode

  • Give yourself permission to lament
  • Keep the lines of communication open
  • Let the joy of the Lord be your strength

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Resources Mentioned: 

 

Other Stuff to Check Out

Let’s Talk!

  1. What decision are you blaming yourself for that your adult child made?
  2. What is one thing you can do to begin developing a friendship with your child(ren)?
  3. Is your joy dependent on your child’s actions/decisions?

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