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One recent weekday evening, my daughter, her husband, and their children stopped by for dinner. That means two adults and five children descended upon my home, bringing with them, a little bit of chaos.

Adding even more fun to the slightly frenetic atmosphere, my friend Michelle also stopped by. She arrived with vegan ingredients in tow to fix a meal for herself. At one point, in the middle of all the hustle and bustle in the kitchen, Michelle asked me if I had any white rice. Not sure, I checked the fridge, and sure enough, there just happened to be a bowl of white rice cooked and ready to go!

I don’t usually have a bowl of white rice hanging around.

As pleasantly surprised as I was that I could meet her request, I was even more pleased that something as simple as having a bowl of white rice handy in the fridge made my friend’s day.

In fact, Michelle commented that my provision of white rice made her feel like she was “at home.” Who knew that leftover white rice would do that?

Listen, life is not about the picture-perfect moments on social media, the spotless tables, or empty sinks. Often, the most fulfilling moments of life are lived in the moments that don’t make it on camera.

Or in the moments you find items hiding in the fridge.

It’s the simple things y’all.

When my grandkids come to visit, I usually hand them window markers to mark up the windows near the kitchen table to their heart’s content. They have a bedroom with furniture arranged just for them. When possible, there is always room for them at the dinner table. The goal is for them to know that whenever they come over, my home is a home for them too –a place that can give them a sense of belonging and give them experiences that are the stuff memories are made of.

Sometimes, the messy places and simple things make home, home—white rice, marker-stained windows, rearranged furniture, noisy, chaotic kitchens, and dirty dishes— all of the things that create space for memories that will last! Memories are the warm experiences that will stick with us over time, hold us years from now, and give us something to pass on to our kids so they can pass them on to their kids, who will then pass them to their kids and so on.

Growing up, certain aspects of my childhood always made home feel like home. Music playing in the house formed a thread that tied our family together. The food prepared in the kitchen nourished not only our stomachs but also our hearts. During the summers, we would spend time at my grandmother’s house.  She would make us grilled cheese and hot tea with milk. We would eat that all day! Still to this day, when I make it for myself or for my kids, that combination creates a soothing balm that still calms me to this day. All of the sights, sounds, and smells of home created during my childhood established lasting memories I carried into adulthood to later share with my family and loved ones.

In our homes, lives, and families, we can create restful spaces, develop atmospheres of love and belonging, and make room for memories to be made. We do this through the sights, sounds, and smells we associate with home. The candle you light every morning, the music that plays on the radio and flows from room to room, the signs of life in the form of papers sitting on the table or dishes towering in the sink – these are all testaments of life being lived and memories being made.

So, when you start getting overwhelmed by the noise, the clutter, and the chaos, may this be the reminder and release you need to know it’s okay to let the clutter sit, allow the dishes to pile, and embrace the mess in the middle because they are all memories in the making. Your very real-life rhythms are proof of your home being a home where lives are nurtured and true moments that matter are created.

 

Highlights from Today’s Episode

  • Create memories that matter
  • Embrace the messiness of your everyday
  • Find joy in simple things

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Let’s Talk!

  1. What sights, sounds, and smells remind you of home?
  2. How are memories made in your home?
  3. What are some areas in your life where you can create space for more moments that make you say “This is what memories are made of?”

 

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