Unforgiveness can be a strong force in our lives. If we choose to hold on to it, over time it will gradually harden our hearts, affecting everything from our actions to our beliefs. We may even begin to see what someone did as who they are. As Christians, we are often reminded–as we should be–of the importance of forgiving others. But what happens when the person we cannot forgive is ourselves? What happens when we come to see ourselves as nothing more than the mistakes we’ve made?

Kontessa Kiel shares how unforgiveness towards herself created a “disconnect” with God, and how reconnecting with him enabled her to love herself again.  She shares the journey of healing she took after going through the pain of abortion, and how that journey enabled her to empower others to heal as well. Processing the overwhelming feelings of shame, guilt, and unforgiveness completely changed how she saw herself, and she now she seeks to bless others with her testimony. In fact, Kontessa is now the Director of Operations for Thrive Women’s Clinic, which serves women who want to explore their options for an unexpected pregnancy and are in need of counseling and medical consultations.

Forgiving others is often a difficult task, but forgiving ourselves can feel nearly impossible. The intense anxiety we experience from facing past decisions and the repercussions we know we deserve are very real, but in Christ, there is relief available. There is forgiveness. There is a path from a hurting heart to a healed one. Kontessa offers a deeply personal perspective on how healing can begin with acceptance.

Join Kontessa and I as we have an intimate conversation about faith, self-love, and redemption.  

Highlights from Today’s Episode:

  • What it means to forgive yourself
  • Nothing disconnects you from God permanently
  • Healing so that you can love yourself again


  • “Are you ready to forgive yourself?” – Kontessa
  • “God loves all of me.” – Chrystal
  • “What scares you about forgiving yourself?” – Kontessa

Resources From Today’s Show 

 ==> General Links 

Have you taken the staying awake assessment? Find it here.

Did you catch last week’s episode, She’s Still Free? Listen here.

Grab my latest book, She’s Still There!

Take a look at Kingdom Woman by Chrystal Evans Hurst and Tony Evans

Let’s Talk!

After you’ve listened to the podcast, I’d love to continue the conversation. Be sure and leave a comment!

  1. Have you ever had difficulty forgiving yourself?
  2. What scares you about forgiving yourself?
  3. Have you ever felt disconnected from God because of past mistakes in life?

Connect with me…

How to Listen to The Podcast

If you’re new to podcasts, think of them like little radio shows that you can listen to at your convenience. They are perfect to listen to and learn from as you workout, fold laundry, wash dishes or conquer the world.

1. Listen right here on the blog. Click the little play button at the beginning of this post.

2. Listen on iTunes or Stitcher or Google Play! – Be sure and subscribe so you don’t miss an episode! Also, if you would be so kind as to leave a rating on iTunes and/or write a 2-3 sentence review there or on Stitcher?  Your commentary or rating helps make the podcast more “findable” by others who might not know it exists!

3. Share today’s show –   Email the link to a friend or share on social media. Just click on the sharing buttons at the bottom of this post!

You have been so great to join me on the journey here on the blog, I hope you jump right in and do the same on the podcast!